So what of the Six Nations to date? The cream of Europe playing in a highly competitive tournament in packed stadia. Highly anticipated drama, passion and age old rivalries once again rekindled. The promise of new blood spilt whilst fighting for the right to be called the best. England, prove your worth and make a country proud. All sound too good to be true?
And then the reality of it kicks in like a mule being tickled down an alleyway. The truth is we stink. The rugby from England is boring and going nowhere fast, apart from downhill. The 2010 Six nations is already a mish mash of the good, bad and oh so ugly.
Where is the promised enthusiasm with flowing moves, breathtaking decision making and lionheart defence? Where is the crowd pleasing breaks, high scoring multi phase moves crossing most of the pitch intertwined with cheeky individual breaks from talented super fit athletes in their prime? Nowhere to be seen, not from my view.
Where are the upbeat and well watered crowd pleading for more? Each and every one hanging onto the thread that next week can cause an upset, a bigger drama, more of the same. Tens of thousands going away thirsty still for highlights reels that expose the other home nations in an embarrassing regularity, masterminding the French to a sorry bucket of despair or the Italians to a soggy frozen pizza from an English high powered microwave.
The boys just don't seem hungry enough. It's not there, the passion or pride, nothing is there to dazzle and make us believe that the team is flourishing and improving. The drama from England only lasts for minutes yet continues to be causing heartache for most of each and every game.
Patriotic St.George flag wavers will always spend thousands and more thousands watching their (anti) heroes and former World champions falter, stumble and eventually fail time and time and again. It doesn't matter what the results, its more about the week-end away than the result to stay. So why oh why are they playing so negatively? At least make these long suffering fans happy in Rome or Edinburgh.
The coach is a hero. He is a monster amongst mere mortals. A brute of a man who doesn't smile or change expression whether winning, losing or being interviewed by another BBC drone. The man is an anamoly of human nature, a true sporting freak from the dark ages with a presence to put fear not only into the opposition but now, it seems, also his own team.
What has happened is team Martin Johnson are like a squad of lemmings, following their coach without question, afraid to break from the family circle of trust and devoid
of their own thinking. The captain, 'steady Steve Borthwick' seems glazed over at the suggestion he could be leading a team bursting with energy and potential down a tepid road filled with muddy potholes to wallow in for a few years.
Is there a situation that Mr.Steady can't 'take lots of positives' from. He is blind to running rugby, nearly as much as the ever present darling Wilkinson. But that is another story for another million cloumn inches. Pass the ball Johnny, pass the ball please.
If England aren't playing at all, Italy aren't good enough and Scotland have less players by the day then who is there to watch? What team is going to send me down the pub for an extra pint rather than the sofa with my wife's milky tea to keep me company?
Ireland look like yesterday's champions more and more with half a team too inexperienced or past their running best. Wales are confused whether they are good enough or not, whether they should run and kick or run and tackle or kick and kick some more. Potential but its just that, potential. A bit more exciting but still the fear of the nation is there on each and every shoulder.
The saving light being France and their want to pass, run, score and entertain. The French, with their fickle Parisian fans and evergreen Gallic flair we are fed in commentary cliche time after time. The French, with their abandon to the normal, the love to dance and tickle through minute gaps and mesmerise with the touch that comes from a coach's freedom to express.
The one team that really gets us interested, applauding, crying and wanting more. The mainland Brits should look and learn, the fan won't be this obedient forever. Allez les Bleus est Laissez les bons temps rouler.
Monday, 15 February 2010
Wednesday, 10 February 2010
Arse-nil, again and again. Time for change?
Arsene Wenger is going backwards. There, I've said what even the most devout Arsenal fan has locked away in his head but scared to mutter in public for fear of being condemned for madness and burnt at the gooner stake.
The much vilified mega manager has a track record to be proud of including, er, erm, nothing since 2005.
So what? What is making those alarm bells ring from Highbury all the way to Monaco?
The end of the season is what. The end of the season without Arsenal, again. Well, not strictly speaking. They will be there but trophyless once again. Guaranteed.
The end of the season always gets the juices flowing from the man in the pub, black cabbie or white collared colleague. Will it be United again? Can Chelsea do it without Mourinho? City to come from a dark holeand surprise everyone?
One thing is for sure. Arsenal wont win it with Wenger. Not now and probably not next year, or the year after. Especially with the lack of firepower, sterility being shown and the constant necessity to pass the ball into the net. Arsene. Sort it out or go home and crush grapes.
The much vilified mega manager has a track record to be proud of including, er, erm, nothing since 2005.
So what? What is making those alarm bells ring from Highbury all the way to Monaco?
The end of the season is what. The end of the season without Arsenal, again. Well, not strictly speaking. They will be there but trophyless once again. Guaranteed.
The end of the season always gets the juices flowing from the man in the pub, black cabbie or white collared colleague. Will it be United again? Can Chelsea do it without Mourinho? City to come from a dark holeand surprise everyone?
One thing is for sure. Arsenal wont win it with Wenger. Not now and probably not next year, or the year after. Especially with the lack of firepower, sterility being shown and the constant necessity to pass the ball into the net. Arsene. Sort it out or go home and crush grapes.
Monday, 1 February 2010
New Torvill and Dean anyone?
Winter Olympics anyone? For those old enough to remember and romantic British Ice Skating fans there will only ever be two names worth mentioning, Torvill and Dean. The pair that spun and waltzed on ice so memorably to Bolero picking up the seemingly impossible 12 perfect 6's leaving the British public in awe and celebrating that rarest of rarities, a British Gold medal in the Winter Olympics.
Vancouver 2010 promises to be a whole lot different, more medals, more close shaves, mor people at home not giving a monkey's about a load of kids on wheel free skateboards and more lycra than at a Tory S and M party. Medals and more is what we want buthow about the chances?
A whopping 26years of, well nothing much happening at all as far as British frozen sport is concerned. Since T and D slid to Gold the only other victory has come in 2002 - womens team Curling. The show stopping event/sport that is a mixture of bowling and shuffleboard as millions of us became glued to the box for a few days as Rhona Martin and her Scottish housewives took to cleaning, I mean Curling the ice better than a load of Canadians or Russians could polish it.
What does two and a half weeks of Olympic sport have to grab the public starting on Feb 12th? What is there to get us excited about? A promised three medals from Olympic chiefs is what they reckon. £6.5m of spending to pay for extra tight thermals and a spare pair of salopettes seems quite a lot to me.
However, look a bit closer and for once the boys and girls from Essex, the Home Counties and North of the Border have got something to prove. Somehow Britain are to be ranked in the top 12 nations competing! Not bad for a non-alpine Island, even better when you consider there will be over 50 of us flying the flag in -25Canadian degrees. Not bad at all for a country that stands still at the first sign of a blizzard, let alone compete in it.
So where is the focus of attention going to be for the truly mad sports fan tuning into Eurosport's religious coverage or BBC2 when they can be bothered? Forget downhill, slalom, giant slalom or any other take on getting down a hill as quickly as possible with falling over - Almost guaranteed is a Brit no show on the podium.
Instead, i'll be tuned in to the one Winter sport 'we' excel at - Skeleton or 'Tea Tray' as its more affectionately known. The one sport where Britain has never failed to take a medal including the sole medal in 2006 from Shelley Rudman's skeleton silver. Last year Britain had two World silver medallists with Shelley finishing in the top four in every event but one last year and Amy Williams also a consistent top performer, a 1-2 is surely not entirely out of the question.
You may not care now, as I don't really, but come the middle of Feb as another dark night settles down over your Coronation Street gloom and you flick through the channels to two girls in skin tight outfits flying down a piece of ice at up to 140km/h you might get a prick of interest. A sport designed for kamikaze pilots, agile athletes and superheroes has been taken over by the Brits in crash helmets with Lion hearts and fast legs.
Sprinting, sliding, crashing, splitting and dealing with up to 5G's of pressure is all part of the game when deciding who comes out on top. For once, lets get all Arctic and follow the girls down the ice with a bit of passion and hopefully in a month's time we will be celebrating Great Britain's best ever Winter Olympic Medal haul with thanks to Curlers, Bobsleigh and lots of lovely girls on their skeletons!
Vancouver 2010 promises to be a whole lot different, more medals, more close shaves, mor people at home not giving a monkey's about a load of kids on wheel free skateboards and more lycra than at a Tory S and M party. Medals and more is what we want buthow about the chances?
A whopping 26years of, well nothing much happening at all as far as British frozen sport is concerned. Since T and D slid to Gold the only other victory has come in 2002 - womens team Curling. The show stopping event/sport that is a mixture of bowling and shuffleboard as millions of us became glued to the box for a few days as Rhona Martin and her Scottish housewives took to cleaning, I mean Curling the ice better than a load of Canadians or Russians could polish it.
What does two and a half weeks of Olympic sport have to grab the public starting on Feb 12th? What is there to get us excited about? A promised three medals from Olympic chiefs is what they reckon. £6.5m of spending to pay for extra tight thermals and a spare pair of salopettes seems quite a lot to me.
However, look a bit closer and for once the boys and girls from Essex, the Home Counties and North of the Border have got something to prove. Somehow Britain are to be ranked in the top 12 nations competing! Not bad for a non-alpine Island, even better when you consider there will be over 50 of us flying the flag in -25Canadian degrees. Not bad at all for a country that stands still at the first sign of a blizzard, let alone compete in it.
So where is the focus of attention going to be for the truly mad sports fan tuning into Eurosport's religious coverage or BBC2 when they can be bothered? Forget downhill, slalom, giant slalom or any other take on getting down a hill as quickly as possible with falling over - Almost guaranteed is a Brit no show on the podium.
Instead, i'll be tuned in to the one Winter sport 'we' excel at - Skeleton or 'Tea Tray' as its more affectionately known. The one sport where Britain has never failed to take a medal including the sole medal in 2006 from Shelley Rudman's skeleton silver. Last year Britain had two World silver medallists with Shelley finishing in the top four in every event but one last year and Amy Williams also a consistent top performer, a 1-2 is surely not entirely out of the question.
You may not care now, as I don't really, but come the middle of Feb as another dark night settles down over your Coronation Street gloom and you flick through the channels to two girls in skin tight outfits flying down a piece of ice at up to 140km/h you might get a prick of interest. A sport designed for kamikaze pilots, agile athletes and superheroes has been taken over by the Brits in crash helmets with Lion hearts and fast legs.
Sprinting, sliding, crashing, splitting and dealing with up to 5G's of pressure is all part of the game when deciding who comes out on top. For once, lets get all Arctic and follow the girls down the ice with a bit of passion and hopefully in a month's time we will be celebrating Great Britain's best ever Winter Olympic Medal haul with thanks to Curlers, Bobsleigh and lots of lovely girls on their skeletons!
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